Autism and Mind Reading!

“I was helping you in my head!”  Osborn

A comment from Osborn as I was struggling to get the lower basket of the dishwasher onto the lower runners, and the unbalanced weight of the basket was making it almost impossible.  Osborn was standing behind me watching me with huge interest and as I finally managed to get the blasted thing in, I turned and gasped at him “Thanks for your help Osborn!”.  In answer to this he came out with the above comment “I was helping you in my head” he mused.  

A good point for all of us maybe with everyone we know?
I’ve had this one constantly over the years, my beautiful autistic babies think something, so therefore, it is done.  Nikita used to go into meltdown because she was telling me something in her head and couldn’t understand why I couldn’t hear what she was saying!  The meltdowns would go on for hours with me feeling baffled and helpless at her distress but unable to assist
Nowadays, I still find myself constantly reminding the children to say please and thank you, it’s not that they haven’t been t.aught theses basics of courtesy right from when they started to talk, it’s that they say it in their heads and truly believe that they’ve said it out loud!  Whenever I pull them up they’re extremely apologetic and bemused that they hadn’t actually said it.
They seem to have an innate inability to define what is real and what they are thinking, it makes me question whether it’s a sensory issue?  Do they have the feeling that words have come out of their mouths and therefore it feels real?  I really don’t know, but I do know that their senses work in a very different way to what is generally regarded as normal.  They don’t feel heat and cold in the same way, insisting on wearing a vest in the summer on the hottest days and refusing the wear a coat when it’s sub-zero, and yet suffering no ill effects on either occasion.  They really don’t feel what we feel.
Certain noises causing excruciating physical pain, food textures that actually make them vomit and smells that cause them to run as far away as they can.  We’ve had all of these and many more, and they’re all very, very real, but even more remarkable is the fact that just  the memory can cause the same symptoms.  Maybe this is where their brains are hypersensitive and struggle to differentiate real from imagined?

What I do know is that I can never assume anything when it comes to my children!  They’re not being rude when they don’t help, they’re not being impolite when they don’t say please and thank you and sometimes it’s just that something is in their heads, and therefore, it is!  Maybe everyone living with someone on the spectrum should try this philosophy and see if helps them?

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