Janeks and random acts of hatred
What a sad and disturbing subject to write about. Sad because it happened at all, disturbing because it could happen to anyone, anytime and throws up so many questions. I am, of course, referring to the random, unprovoked attack on Janeks on Thursday evening.
Janeks doesn’t have a malicious bone in his body, he is a genuinely sweet, kind natured guy. He wants to live a happy, peaceful life in a country that has welcomed him and he appreciates the life he has here is so much better than it would be in Latvia. He has become like a second son to me and I love him dearly.
As many of you already know he was attacked in a pub in Coventry on Thursday evening when he went in to use the loo. For some reason the guy in there took exception to him and punched him, the bar lady got involved and also punched him and tore his hair, the next thing Janeks knew there was a knife.
Is this the whole solution or do we need to dig deeper into the ‘why’?
He had no idea he’d been stabbed, adrenaline I guess, and by the time he returned to where Nikita was waiting for him he was covered in blood. She was hysterical, someone called the ambulance and police, I received a frantic call telling me he’d been stabbed in the neck and all hell broke loose.
When I arrived at the station Janeks was already in the ambulance and the perpetrators had been arrested. It was then that I realised that not only had he been stabbed in the back of the head/neck but he also had a huge gash on his left cheek. I was heartbroken for him.
Once at the hospital the police took a lengthy statement and the wound in the back of his neck was stitched. He’d been lucky, a few millimetres in any direction and the outcome would have been very different. The plastic surgeon took a look and decided to keep him in and undertake the repair on his face under general anaesthetic the following day in order to reduce the risk of massive scarring.
Surgery done ( and an amazing job as well, a huge thank you to the plastic surgery team at Walsgrave Hospital) and he is now home recovering.
This all leads us on to question why such a thing should happen? How does a person develop so much hatred within that they feel the need to destroy anything they take exception to?
Am I being soft not just calling him all of the names under the sun? No, I don’t believe so, we all behave the way we do due to a myriad of different factors. Some are environmental, some nurture, some nature I guess, but is anyone actually born ‘bad’?
I know this argument has been raging forever and someday we may actually understand ourselves well enough to know the answer, in the meantime, I do believe that a persons upbringing, their school experience, the people they mix with, diet etc…etc…all mould a person throughout their life. Sometimes the mould is distorted and the end result is not as we would have wished, sometimes the person doing the moulding is too indifferent to do a good enough job. Whatever it is, the end result can be good, bad or a mega disaster.
I know nothing about the people who attacked Janeks, all I know is that somewhere down the line something must have happened to mess up their emotional wiring. That level of hatred doesn’t come from nowhere so whilst the people involved will be punished appropriately for their crimes, will anyone ever actually sit down with them to try to understand what it is in their psyche that caused them to do it in the first place?
Surely, understanding what makes people do the things they do is a step in the direction of knowing which problems in society need fixing and therefore being able to tackle them? If they go to prison they will come out as the same people and therefore capable of doing the same thing again to someone else.
Am I soft…..yes…..am I angry with them….yes….would I like to understand why….YES….. I would like to meet the people responsible, not so I can shout and scream at them about how terrible they are, just to be able to ask them what went so horribly wrong in their lives that this is how they became. Because until we understand the why we can’t begin to arrive at a solution.
And all of this ties in with my work with Autistic people. They are misunderstood and badly treated because of the overall lack of awareness of how their brain works. Some of them turn out ‘bad’ because of it through no real fault of their own and I know a few.
Do I believe the people who did this shouldn’t be punished…..definitely not……they have to know they can’t get away with it. But on the flip side of the coin, I do believe that more work should be done on getting to the root cause of the ‘why’, doing this is the only way forward to starting to solve the problems.